Friday, February 11, 2011

making friends with painful feelings

Maybe I should see being a caregiver as a chance to develop a side of me that has been relatively weak.  But I have a very strong reaction that I refuse to go gentle into that good night.  So I'm stuck in a situation where I resent the role I have to play and what I have had to give up of my own plans for these years.  I've struggled with my resentment for several years now, and I don't find a way to work through it and make it go away.

So I'm trying a different approach.  Often our painful feelings are there for a good reason.  It is the force of growth inside us that makes being stuck so painful.  So I'm trying to look at it from the perspective that I'm glad I feel resentment and other painful feelings.  If I didn't, I wouldn't have so clear an impulse in me to lead me to growth and healing.  I want to learn to let the feelings live, even make friends with them.

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