forgiveness (yet again)

I was shaken by a sermon on forgiveness this past Sunday. What came up for me was not so much the wounds of my childhood but finding the balance in marriage of standing up for what I need vs. forgiving or not keeping score. It is so easy for me to feel I am bad for standing up for what I need.

Someone said to me today: "You don't deserve to be blamed for what you needed to do to survive when someone failed to feed you." I think what that means on a practical level is that I should try to make sure my needs are seen first, and then forgive.