blame

I was diagnosed yesterday with pre-diabetes. It shouldn't be a suprise; I've worried about my blood sugar for years (because I was borderline for gestational diabetes and because I was diagnosed with diabetes 5 years ago only to have my doctor say no, don't worry, on the basis of a different test). I'm below the diabetes line partly because I have done a good job of improving my diet (using the glycemic index). Yet the diagnosis still has thrown me for a loop. One of the things that bothers me most is that I feel everyone will see it as my fault for being overweight. With some outside help, my doctor has gotten the message not to tell me I have to lose weight (that triggers too many negative childhood messages). But it was clear that he didn't quite know what to say when he couldn't make that his central point.