sadness

I am realizing how much I learned as a child not to trust ordinary things, because the abuse proved that what seemed to be a fairly normal life was false. My difficulty in making friends is that casual interactions don't mean very much to me; I only trust deep sharing. That is actually what I like about email and it happens to some extent with blogs--it is possible to jump directly to talking about the deep real things, to get beyond the level of casual conversation.