getting ready to travel

My endometrial biopsy Monday was easy, and they were hoping to have the results this week, but I haven't heard anything.  Hopefully I will hear Monday.  My doctor and I were talking about the bleeding I had and she said "maybe you just threw an egg."  Scary to think that maybe I could have gotten pregnant two years after my last period.

Yesterday I focused on errands that needed to be done before I go away, so today I am focusing on packing.  It seems more difficult because I am driving--I have room to take more.  And it is always tricky because it can be so cold in Chatham in June.

I just checked Google maps and it tells me that in the next two days I have 17 hours of driving (in the absence of traffic)--986 miles.  That is actually a bit shorter than  I thought it was.  It is 10 hours to Harrisburg PA, which is roughly my goal for tomorrow.  But I'm flexible.

Race Report: Clemson Triathlon

750 meter swim 27:53
T1: 4:31
11 mile bike 53:07
T2: 2:08
5K run: time not posted

I hestitated whether to do this race because I have been doing so little training.  But I hated to miss it--I have done Clemson five times, just skipping last year because that was the weekend that worked for my sister to help my mother move.  So I signed up, figuring I could pull out if my knees or back started giving me trouble.  I was pretty faithful about taking a 10 to 15 mile bike ride every weekend the last month, but I didn't push my run/walk past the 2 miles I have been doing.  I did the open water swim practice two weeks ago and I was excited to be doing it, which convinced me that I would enjoy the race.

I got up around 6 and had a leisurely breakfast and rode my bike to the race.  Very relaxed.  It was after 7:15 when I got there, so I didn't have a long time to wait around, though I think the start was later than 8 am.  I had decided not to bother with a wetsuit and was happy that the water felt quite warm.  It felt 78 to me, but they didn't announce that so it must have been just under.  I swam in my sports bra and tri-shorts and then added a short sleeved shirt.

Usually I have been so excited I get out of breath at the start of the swim, but I got a steadier start this time.  The water was still but the sky was cloudy so the buoys were easy to see.  I was pleased with how straight I swam.  This race starts people in waves of 50 or so, and while there was at least one wave that passed me, I didn't get pushed around at all.  It is a long run barefoot to the transition area.

The bike went smoothly and I think I kept my level of effort up fairly well.  I passed a couple of people the last mile.  I ate a half a peanut butter and marmalade sandwich, which tasted wonderful.

The first mile of the run my legs were pretty unhappy and I wondered if I could go three miles.  I took frequent short walk breaks and walked the uphills, and that felt right.  By the time I got to the turn around my legs felt much better.  It had gotten fairly hot, but I was grateful for a breeze and for a cloud that shaded me most of the time I was on the dike.  A Great Blue Heron flew low over the dike not far ahead of me.  I was enjoying the world around me.

I was happy to see the photographer still there when I finished.  Usually it seems the photographer doesn't wait around for the last few finishers.  The web site doesn't list a finish time for me, which surprised me, as the finish was still set up and I would have said the timing system beeped when I finished.  They have been nice in the past about not cutting off people who exceed the time limit.  I didn't happen to look at the clock, so I realized I had no idea of my time and that was probably a good thing. But I would like to have it for future comparisons.  And I had been feeling so comfortable because it is a Set Up Events race, and I trust them.  I did listen to the awards because sometimes I am 3rd out of 3 in my age group, but this is a big race for around here (over 400) and there were more than 3 women in the 55 to 59 year old age group.

I felt sore but I kept walking to gather up my things and after a while my legs felt ok but tired.  No chafing, which makes me feel I've found the right approach to what to wear.  I wasn't looking forward to riding my bike the three miles home but it felt like it was good for my legs to go back to riding after running.  I did walk my bike up the hill to my house.

It also meant that I was still warm enough that I stretched when I got home, which should help how I feel tomorrow.  I also lay on the floor for a while with ice under my back and my legs elevated.  It is nice to feel virtuously tired.  And now it is raining, much needed, so the weather has been very cooperative.

Elizabeth's school formal

Elizabeth's school has an annual formal dance for students in grades 9-12, but seniors make a bigger deal of it so it comes close to being a prom.  Elizabeth has attended all four years; she and her boyfriend got together after going to the formal together freshman year.  She has been looking forward to this year for months, and finally tonight is the night.  I think she went shopping with friends for her dress.  She wasn't happy with her choices of evening bags so she crocheted her own.  Her advisor gave her a ride to a store to buy a black satin ribbon for the strap. 

After watching my friends post pictures of their daughters heading out to the prom, I wished for some way to honor the occasion even though she is in Massachusetts and I am in South Carolina.  So I suggested that I get her flowers.  I checked with her boyfriend's parents and they though he should do it, but he and Elizabeth said they would be glad for me to do it.  I thought I could come up with something different and modern.

I looked at a lot of pictures on the internet, and came up with links to send to the Concord Flower Shop.  The person I spoke to there a week ago said she definitely could do something like the example I found of an upper arm corsage.  I hadn't seen Elizabeth's dress but I knew it was black and white flowers, one shoulder, so we settled on a gardenia and small orchids.  I have only seen a cell phone photo so far, but I think it worked well.

more medical stuff

After John had to go to urgent care because he couldn't urinate, I have been increasingly thinking that he needs to go ahead and have surgery to fix the scarring from his previous surgery for benign prostate enlargement.  He has been resisting the idea, then focused on wanting to go to a different urologist who might try to avoid surgery.  He got a recommendation of a urologist from a friend, and we saw that doctor yesterday for a second opinion.  The doctor said John needs surgery, and this time he accepted that.  He said he had lost trust in his other doctor and wants this doctor to do it, which is ok with me (a 45 minute drive instead of 20 minutes but not too much of a problem). The next step is a cystoscopy to look more carefully at what is going on and decide exactly what kind of surgery, but the doctor did say they could do the surgery with spinal anesthesia, not a general.  The doctor was kind enough to squeeze John into his schedule for the cystoscopy in early May.

I had to write a letter to my doctor to get my test (endometrial biopsy) moved up to before we go out of town, but I did get that scheduled for May 16.  My letter took the approach that it isn't that I am panicked about cancer but rather I am worried about having a precancerous condition and having them recommend a hysterectomy, which I would need to have scheduled as early as possibly in July.  I'm glad my letter worked, but I also have a "gulp" reaction that my worries are realistic.

So it isn't going to be a fun summer.  After his surgery, John is likely to have a foley catheter for at least a week, so he will be not able to do much for himself for at least that long.  I fear that if I need a hysterectomy, I will not be able to have the easier surgery because I have a largish calcified fibriod, so that could be 6 weeks of recovery before I am supposed to lift more than 5 pounds.

life is complicated

This is my place to vent--if you get tired of my complaining stick to what I post on Facebook, which is more balanced.

I've had a frustrating time with my doctor's office about my test results.  When I hadn't heard back in a week about a test done in their office, I called.  I didn't get a call back until 6 pm, and then I got a message saying that my uterine lining was too thick and they want to do an endometrial biopsy, and I should call in the morning to schedule.  When I called, they said someone would call me right back.  When I hadn't heard in an hour I called again.  Turned out the nurse wanted to talk to me to make sure I understood the procedure.  She did answer my question, said there would be some cramping.  Then she transferred my call to the person making appointments.  The first appointment available was the day I need to leave to drive up to Concord.  So I couldn't get an appointment until late June, though I did ask to be called if there was a cancellation.

I'm frustrated to have to wait that long--I don't like living with uncertainty either about whether something is wrong or about whether having to do something more could affect my summer plans.  I'm not much worried about cancer--there isn't a lot in my family and I got tested at the first sign of problems.  There is a good chance that it is nothing.  But what I'm worried about is some kind of mild precancerous state that would mean a difficult decision if they recommend a hysterectomy.

I did tell John.  I realize that thinking he would worry is wishful thinking--he is off in his own world and my issues don't much register.

more TMI--John's urologist visit

On Saturday John was unable to empty his bladder and had to go to the urgent care center and get a catheter put in.  He hardly wanted to get out of his chair while it was in.  Today he went to the urologist and got it removed, but when we went back in the afternoon he wasn't emptying well.  We talked a lot about what to do and he really wanted to try and see if he would be ok without it, though the nurse practioner thought it would be better to put it back in for a while.  The compromise finally was that they taught himself to cath himself instead of using that kind that stays in (Foley catheter).  He didn't like the experience, but what a relief to think that he won't have to go to the emergency room if he can't void at all. 

Menopause (don't read if it is TMI)

I had a tough perimenopause and a fairly easy menopause, I thought.  I never took hormonal birth control (I used a diaphram my whole reproductive life) so I didn't have a planned menopause.  The first changes of perimenopause for me were mild hot flashes at night and my periods became regular, after being very irregular (28-60 days) my whole reproductive life.  That was fine, except it lasted around 5 years and my periods kept getting heavier and longer.  My doctor recommended ablation to reduce the flow, but I said I would try to wait it out.  And indeed my periods stopped before the heavy flow became unmanageable.

I skipped a few periods, then had a few, several times, then went 9 months or so, then had a couple, and finally it has been 20 months or so since I last had a period.  The hot flashes never got bad (I do think taking fish oil reduces them for me) and while this has been a difficult period of my life for outside reasons, I never felt menopause had caused mood swings.  I find grapeseed oil is all I need to manage personal dryness.  At one point about a year after my periods stopped I experienced rapid weight gain no matter how carefully I ate, but that has stablized.

But now after 20 months I have my period again.  Discouraging.  I assume my doctor is going to want to do an ultrasound.  The last time I had one, maybe 5 years ago, I found it triggering, and said to myself the next time I would bring my husband to support me.  But he's impaired enough by his own illness that he wouldn't be a help now.  I guess I'll try music.  I'm not worried that I might have cancer--this has been so much a normal period that it doesn't feel like something is out of whack.

It is annoying to have to go back out and buy supplies.  I gave most everything away, but luckily I had kept a box of my favorite o.b. ultra, which are no longer available.  I did just do some research because I remembered reading when it was too late to help me that progesterone is the best treatment for heavy flow.  And I learned that taking ibuprofen may reduce flow by 25%.  I already took a Naproxen today to help the crampiness so I will wait to tonight to switch to ibuprofen, but I'm happy to know that there is something easy I can do.

Cross reference added later to more of the story